Where do you see yourself in 5 years? I hate this question. When I was younger I was always ready. Quickly I would state the career I wanted (at the time, it could have been a number of things from Astronaut to Zoologist). I hoped to be married at 25 with x amount of children (the number fluctuated as I myself aged). As I grew closer to 25 I realized that none of it was going to become a reality. I couldn't fathom being a mother or a wife. And I wasn't any closer to figuring out what I wanted to do with my life.
I can't imagine having a career where I spend 20 years going to the same office day in and day out. Seeing the same people and doing the same thing. I would HATE to have to wake up every morning and force myself to go to a place I hated.
So although I am unsure about specific facts here are some things that I do know:
- I want to make a difference in people's lives.
- I would be happy without children but I'm willing to try and be a good mother.
- I'm afraid of falling in love but it will be nice to share my life with someone.
- I can't have a career that requires me to work from 9 to 5, 5 days a week, with only 2 weeks vacation.
- I want to be happy.
Do you screen your phone calls?Of course! Caller ID was one of the greatest inventions of the 20th century. Remember the old days when you had to let the call go to voice mail?When was the last time you lost your temper?I'm not exactly sure, but I'm usually pretty good at controlling myself when I'm angry. It takes a lot to make me flip out and when I do I can be pretty hurtful. So I try not to do it too often.When you're lost, do you ask for directions?I HATE asking for directions. I like trying to find my way on my own. And sometimes it's great fun getting lost.
This weekend I decided, once again, to try and complete the Tim Tang Test. This is my third time with this insanity and I am still struggling. The last time, which was about a year ago, I reached Level 48 and stopped. Well, to be honest, I couldn't continue if I wanted. I was completely stuck. The most infuriating part is the answers are quite simple, but you don't always realize how easy until you solve it.
I'm not ashamed to say that usually, when I get stuck playing a game I cheat. I look up video game walkthroughs all the time. This doesn't work with this game. There are many websites and forums that discuss the game but participants aren't open with the answers. Instead they try to guide you on the right path.
The puzzle itself provides many clues per level: in the mouse-over text, the answer entry box, the background music and other, even more obscure places. Some levels even provide a Google toolbar. You will need to do a lot clever googling to get the information you need on some of the puzzles, while others are solvable purely by reasoning...eventually!
There are 250 levels and I am only on level 4. So far, no-one has completed it. Only 105 have even made it past level 100.
If you do decide to try your hand (or should I say brain) on this I highly recommend joining the facebook group. It was started by 'Tim Tang' himself and you'll find lots of ready help there.
Good Luck and Happy Riddling!
The most painful state of being is remembering the future, particularly one you can never have.
-Søren Kierkegaard
It's the same thing every week. Where are we going? What should we wear? Let's go to the mall to buy another outfit which we'll only wear once or twice because you don't want to be caught wearing the same thing in numerous facebook albums.
I'm getting a bit tired of it all.
1. As a kid I was in love with Elvis Presley. My Dad would buy me his records and I would listen to them everyday. I soon began to wonder if I was actually Elvis reincarnated. I mean, the only person who could love you so much would have to be yourself…right?
2. I am a huge klutz. In fact, I could fill up an hour of America’s Funniest Home videos with my escapades. I have walked into screen doors, crashed into a tree while sledding, hit my head on ceiling lamps, twice and the pièce de résistance is when I walked into a pole.
3. I am a genius. In fact I was reading at the age of 2. Okay, so maybe I wasn’t exactly reading so much as memorizing. But that’s still great. How many 2 year olds do you know who can recite entire books?
4. When I was 10, I went against my parents and secretly stayed up late to watch Child’s Play. I didn’t think it was too bad until that night when I woke up to use the bathroom and realized one of my dolls was on the bed next to me. I was terrified and could not move. I finally jumped up and sped out of my room. I slept with my sister for the remainder of the night. From that night forward I would lock my dolls in the closet before going to sleep.
5. I’m all for animal rights but secretly believe that all animals can be hunted in moderation. Yes, I am an awful, awful person.
6. Although I am one of the nicest person you will ever meet, I was quite mean as a kid. I used to stand behind the safety of my fence and tease the children in my neighborhood as they walked by.
7. Apparently, to some people, I can’t hold a note. To me, when I sing I sound absolutely fabulous. I believe with a little bit of training and studio time, I can be a successful songstress. If Brittney Spears and Jessica Simpson can do it why can’t I?
8. I LOVE the car wash. I have as much fun in there as I do on a roller coaster.
9. I also love the splash when cars drive into puddles. It gives me thrills.
10. I am completely happy being single. Sometimes I wonder if I will ever be ready to be a wife and mother.
11. I have wanted a tattoo since I was 6. If I wasn’t so indecisive I would have a lot more than the tiny one on my wrist.
12. I can memorize any Disney song but ask me to sing something off of Billboard Top 20 and I’ll have to Google the lyrics first.
13. Growing up I have wanted to be everything from an astronaut to a zoologist and everything in between. That includes joining a nunnery and performing burlesque.
14. I didn’t know who Notorious B.I.G. was until after he was dead. I kept hearing “I’ll be missing you on the radio and loved it. I finally saw the video and at the end they showed his picture with his birth and death date.
15. I don’t understand why everyone hated the Blair Witch Project. It was one of the best movies I saw in 1999.
16. Sometimes when cooking I pretend I have my own cooking show. I talk to an imaginary audience and explain all the steps I’m taking to prepare the dish.
17. I am an adventure living inside of a scardy cat. I want to go bungie jumping, sky diving, cliff jumping, repelling etc. but I think I'll be part of that tiny percent where something goes wrong. My rope will break or my parachute may not open. I'm not afraid to die but I'm terrified of pain.
18. I am still hoping for a future like the Jetson’s. Can I please see and ride in a flying car before I die? I would also like a robot like Rosie.
19. I am the world’s worst speller. I have used spell check about a hundred times since writing this note.
20. I can sometimes tell what time it is by where the sun is positioned in the sky. Well, I’ve done it once. It was one of the most awesome moments of my life.
21. Before I die I hope to have stood on every continent, that includes Anarctica.
22. I never let people read my fictional writing. When I was in the 7th a grade a teacher read one of my stories out loud to the class and demolished it. Although she did it anonymously I still felt embarrassed and hurt. I don't ever want to go through something like that again. She didn't only criticize my writing but something bigger...my imagination.
23. None of my friends or family knows about my blog...not yet anyway.
24. Unlike normal parents who punished their children by taking away television and video games, my Mom wouldn’t allow me to read. I would have to sneak off to the library and smuggle books into the house. Kimberly would blackmail me by threatening to tell that I had books hiding in her toy box. I acted like a teenager on drugs. My addiction just happened to be books.
25. I don't know whether or not I believe in "happily ever after"
I wish it were Sunday
'Cause that's my funday
My I don't have to runday
Just another Manic Monday
What would you do with an extra hour each day?
Unfortunately I would probably waste that hour doing something unproductive. During the winter, I would most likely be snuggled under the blankets in bed. In the summer, I would like to be here.
Do you wear a watch? If so, tell us about it. If not, how do you keep track of time?
I have two analog watches, one brown and one black. I used to wear them a lot, but I don't know where they are at the moment. (I misplace things all the time). I use my cellphone to track time.
If it was possible, would you want to know how many days you had left to live?
NO WAY!!! I like surprises.
I'll try to keep up with this. So stay tuned for more Manic Mondays.
At the beginning of last year I broke up with my boyfriend. Although I knew it was the right thing to do it was very hard to let go. During the breakup process, which lasted for several months, I wrote him a letter. Here is an excerpt.
I don’t really know where to start. I guess I’m writing this because every time I try to talk to you in person I get too emotional to speak. When I come to you I know exactly what I want to say but tears seem to materialize instead of words.
You know that U2 song, “Stuck in a Moment?” That’s how I’ve been feeling. I keep reliving the hurt. And it comes regardless of where I am or who I’m with. I’ll start remembering and it’s awful. I want to move past this, to somehow get over it. But I can’t when it’s like this…stagnant. I want us to move forward with our lives be it together or separately.
I have loved you since I was 18. That’s my entire adult life. And I don’t want to lose you. I can’t imagine my life without you. But life is short. We are here for just a moment in time and I want to make the best of it. I want to be happy. I want to spend time with the people I love. I want to visit every continent and experience as much as I can in the time that I have. I want to make memories that will last beyond a lifetime. And I want to do that with a man that I love and who loves me.
Letting go literally feels like a part of myself is being ripped off. I feel like we are connected in some invisible way, and pulling away from each other hurts. Like pulling apart two pieces of paper that are glued together.
I think what I need from you is your honesty. I know you think it doesn’t matter when you think I won’t believe you. But I believe in you. I have faith in you. And that’s what I need. Honesty. And I need you to not be afraid of hurting my feelings. If you can’t deal with all this, let me know. Let me go. I know it will hurt but then we can start the process of healing. And right now that can’t happen. I know I’m being a coward and behaving selfishly but I don’t know how to leave you alone. So I need you to do it if that’s what has to happen. I need to hear the words so I can accept it.
I never sent the letter. Instead, I learned how to let go on my own. Now a year later I am happier than I have ever been.
Twenty years from now, you will be more disappointed by the things you did not do than by the things you did do. So, throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.
-Mark Twain
Visiting China has always been a dream of mine. My 外公 or wai gong (mother's father) was born there. It contains a piece of my history. A part of my prologue can be found there.
When my younger cousin, J, was accepted into a study abroad program through his university (NYU) to Shanghai, I was extremely excited for him. I wanted to go for a visit but was unsure about finances. Then the greatest thing happened. Continental airlines began running specials between Boston and Shanghai. My stars suddenly aligned. Was it faith or purely coincidental? I didn’t care. I had a place to stay for free and enough money for airfare. I booked my ticket right away.
After purchasing my ticket the next step was getting a visa. Unfortunately, the closest Chinese Consulate was in New York and they did not accept mail-in applications. That meant this pass weekend I had to travel to the Big Apple.
*Side note
If you are ever traveling between Boston and New York, I recommend taking the Chinatown buses. They are Fung Wah or Lucky Star. At $15 each way, it is not only cheaper than flying but you miss out on all the hassle of the airport. I have traveled with both on numerous occasions and have not had a problem. Most people choose Fung Wah since it's more widely known, but if you are purchasing your ticket in advance on the website you should go with Lucky Star. If you're "lucky" you can actually buy a ticket for $1.
I arrived at the Consulate at about 11am on Friday and stood/sat in line for about 2 hours. When I finally got to the front it took about 3 minutes for the woman to look at my application and passport, and then tell me to come pick it up on the following Monday. (One important thing to remember is have the address of the place you will be staying in China. I saw quite a few people being turned away because they didn't have it on their application.) I have another cousin who lives in the city so I was able to spend the weekend at her house. On Monday I picked up my passport with my visa inside and paid the fee. The next day I was on my way back to Boston. Mission completed.
Expenses:
Roundtrip airfare to Shanghai: $801
Roundtrip bus ticket to New York: $40 (The 2am bus is $10 more)
Double entry visa for 6 months: $45
Next day rush for visa application: $20
Total expense so far: $906
This is actually less than the normal price of a roundtrip ticket to China.
Maybe it is kismet.
OH! In case you were wondering, I leave for Shanghai on April 2 for 20 days.
